How To Love Yourself & Your Body
Growing up, I continually found myself having a negative view of myself and I was stuck in a web of negative self talk. As an adult I have finally been able to be released from some of that through finding methods that encouraged me to view myself in a positive light and it led to confidence within. As humans that are in a community, we are prone to experience self doubt and we may even deal with body image issues. Whether you are a teen, pregnant, a new mom, or single, these are things that can cross our minds and take control of our actions.
A huge part of me developing a negative body image was comparison. Comparison starts at such a young age from when you’re mimicking kids on the playground through the teenage years when your body is developing at a different rate than all of your peers and you don’t know what is happening or why. As a teenager, I dealt with body image issues and I'm sure that I am not alone in experiencing this toxic thought process. Despite the information and resources given to me about what my body was going through at this time, there was still a significant amount of information I did not know. The only thing my mind knew to do was to look at my body development lined up to that of other women.
For me, comparison led to seasons of depression and anxiety. I was overwhelmed with the thought that I was not enough and somehow exponentially different than all of my peers. Compared to men, women may have a stronger genetic predisposition to developing depression which means we need to find effective ways to cope and deal with this. For me, certain triggers came from being uncomfortable with myself and not working on self-confidence.
Every body is different and will change at different times. I did myself a huge disservice by basing my body’s progress on that of someone else’s. Body development is based on many different things including culture, genetics, hormones, nutrition, etc.. Therefore it cannot be assumed that every 13 year old, 18 year old, or even 30 year old will be experiencing the same growth in the same timeline. Every body is different and that is something to be embraced, not despised.
You were created beautiful, it is not something you have to achieve. Beauty is not something that is decided by culture or other people’s standards it is something that I fully believe we are all born with. Sometimes it may be hard for us to see the beauty within us so it may help just sitting down and reflecting on the unique traits that YOU bring to the table. Is it your creative ability, your encouraging words or positive mindset? There is something within you that makes you an individual and if you focus in on it I truly believe change can happen with your confidence and self-love. We have to train our mind how to view ourselves as beautiful, if we don’t the world around us will begin to try to impose and tell us what is beautiful by their own standards.
I fully believe that a positive mindset or outlook can shift your overall thought process and life’s path. Speak life about yourself and your body that was created perfectly imperfect! Love on the parts of you that are hard to love and practice starting your day with positive self talk. What are you constantly telling yourself and what words are you speaking over your situation?
“Solution” Steps
Make yourself aware of the words you use when describing yourself or your situation
Reframe your thoughts and mold your words into an encouraging, confident and empowering message
Journal or find ways to externalize your thoughts to help find the root of where your negative patterns or belief system comes from
Start using positive affirmations to create a more empowering conversation with yourself
Assess your environment and see what you’ve been surrounding yourself with and be conscious of your environment and any negative influences that may be affecting you
Acknowledge the little wins in your day to day. Be proud of yourself and how far you’ve come or reflect on your goals and how far you WILL go.
Taking these steps would be called learned optimism. Learned optimism is developing the ability to view the world from a positive point of view. This is created by challenging negative self talk and replacing pessimistic thoughts with more positive ones. You can learn to be more optimistic if you are not naturally that way. Ultimately, you are in charge of your own happiness.
As a mother it is important to train your kids how to think about themselves at a young age. That way when they grow up, they will avoid a lot of negative thought patterns. Here are some positive affirmations to feed your kids souls and help build them up to be confident humans.
1. I love myself, I’m a great girl/boy.
2. I love myself exactly the way I am.
3. My family loves me or even adores me!
4. My family loves me exactly the way I am.
5. I love learning things. Everyday, I am a little bit wiser.
6. I am going to learn something interesting today.
7. My teachers like me and want to help me learn and become the best person I can be.
8. I am a kind person.
9. I am a good brother/sister.
10. I am a good son/daughter.
11. I am a good friend.
12. I am polite.
13. I am generous.
14. I am fun to be with.
15. I am helpful with household chores.
I hope this encouraged something to shift in your life and that you take these practices and implement them into your everyday and family interactions. Ultimately the goal is to love yourself and build yourself and your children up with your words. Words hold so much weight and I truly believe they can either give life or take it away. What are your words doing?